Life After Divorce











{December 17, 2008}   The Role of Liz’s Husband Will Now Be Played By…

So, you all know things haven’t been good for a while.  I know I am jumping around a bit, but in August this year, I told Steve that I wanted a divorce and that I wasn’t in love with him anymore (you knew it was coming).  That began the crying, begging, and general outpouring of emotion from his general direction.  I decided to stick it out a little while (mostly being a coward and not wanted to create conflict) to see if my feelings would change.  They haven’t.  He is now doing and saying all the things I ever wanted to hear – but they just don’t make a difference anymore. 

Sometimes, if you kick the puppy long enough, it stops coming back to play.

So… now I live in emotion land.  It is the world’s worst amusement park.  If anyone asks you to go… run like hell.  It is not the Happiest Place on Earth.  There is all this crying.  And snot.  Always with the snot.  [shudder]

As the holidays are barreling towards us, things are getting more and more uncomfortable, and his mental stability is hanging on by a thread.  I know I need to just make the break, but I falter every time.  Chicken.  But, now, he is getting aggravated about family gatherings.  He doesn’t want to go to the parties if we are just going to end up splitting up in the coming weeks.  I totally get that.  But then he says really annoying things like, “I want to go to the party as your husband!”  Duh… what else would you be?  This comes up over and over again.  It is enough to make you bring out the sporks crazy.  So, last night, we have this little exchange:  (I relayed it to my dear friend, Lori (who helped plant the idea in my head) and she is now on her way home to change into some Depends, so I thought it would make an excellent blog)

     Steve:  So, Am I going to the party?  (Remember this is probably the 30th time this question has been asked in the past week)

     Me:  I don’t know.  Are you?

     Steve:  I me-e-e-an am I going as your husband???

     Me:  No, I am sorry.  The part of “my husband” has been filled.  However, you are welcome to audition for other available roles, such as ‘wacky neighbor’ or ‘landlord.  However, Hawaiian shirts are required for both roles.

     Steve:  WHO HAS FILLED THE ROLE OF YOUR HUSBAND?!?!?

     Me:  Lori. [snark]

Now… I thought this was very funny.  Apparently, he doesn’t get me.  Underlying theme of our entire relationship.

I don’t know if he is planning to attend said party or not.  I don’t really care, one way or another.

Post Script~ Lori would also like to audition for the role of Mrs. Roper with a sensational mumu and brightly colored clogs.  I offered her these as alternative footwear – I think you will find them appropriate.

 

mrs-roper1

mrs-roper2

Yes, Ladies… look closely.  That IS a $90 price tag on those glorious monstrosities.  Seriously?  Who pays that kind of money for this shoe!  With a wedge heel.  Made of wicker.  WOW.

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Eileen says:

Your writing style never ceases to amaze me… your wit and sassy sarcasm when relaying the most painful of life’s experiences leaves me almost wanting the experiences to linger a bit more… well, almost. 😉

Best of luck to you, Liz.



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